I said I would never ask anything of you, but I do have something to ask you…
…Will you be mine on Dec 17-Jan 3rd?
I would like to take you here baby…
And where this beach is, you will have to wait and see my love!
Forever, and always,
John
A little boy walks up to his father and asks “Dad, what does a vagina look like?”
The little boy’s dad replies “Well son, before sex, it looks like a beautiful rose.”
The little boy then asked “What does it look like after sex”
And his father said “Have you ever seen a bulldog eating mayonnaise?”
An elderly Florida couple, Sam and Bessie, are vacationing in Las Vegas. Sam always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots. Seeing some on sale one day, Sam buys them, and wears them back to the hotel, walking proudly.
He walks into their room and says to his wife, “Notice anything different about me?”
Bessie looks him over, “Nope.”
Sam says excitedly, “Come on, Bessie, take a good look. Notice anything different about me?”
Bessie looks again, “Nope.”
Frustrated, Sam storms off into the bathroom, undresses, and walks back into the room completely naked except for his boots. Again he asks, a little louder this time, “Notice anything different now?” Bessie looks up and says, “Sam, what’s different? It’s hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, it’ll be hanging down again tomorrow.”
Furious, Sam yells, “And do you know why it’s hanging down, Bessie? It’s hanging down because it’s looking at my new boots!”
To which Bessie replies, “Shoulda bought a hat, Sam. Shoulda bought a hat.”
So the latest new gadget roles into town, Apple’s Ipad, and can someone explain to me the need for this useless laptop/over sized phone. Why is it that everyone wants one of these pretty looking paper weights anyways? Sure it looks cool and all but is it really practical and functional?
You simply don’t need one of these devices, its too big (WAY TOO BIG) to replace your phone, yet not powerful enough/ functional enough to replace any weak notebook. Its even way too expensive to be compared to something such as a notebook. The Ipad can go for as much as $699 and your typical notebook can be found from anywhere between $200 – $400. It blows my mind how our materialistic ideology these days wants to always be better then the Jones so we have to buy the most expensive piece of crap out there because its simply got a brand on it! Think practicality people!
need more convincing? the Ipad lacks things such as a camara, physical keyboard (all virtual keyboards suck and are unresponsive), any usb ports, a disk drive, multitasking….hell it even lacks flash support!! How can this thing actually be useful? especially when it can’t even support all of my music and video library for lack of memory! You cannot install any kind of software you want, you have to be subject to only the things available on the app store….which lets be honest, there is nothing on there that is good and free at the same time. Even the expensive apps lack in areas.
Things will only get better people. this device is simply useless, and just wait a few years and you will see what apple’s competitors will role out. I can tell you this, these products will for sure surpass the Ipad and its boat load of shortcomings! The Ipad is only useful for checking out your emails….and even my POS samsung M510 can check my emails if I really feel to lazy to simply flip open my laptop. Its a friggen phase people! snap out of it because I can’t stand apple products and their monopolizing of the market by brainwashing ignorant people into believing that you are only cool when owing one of their products, its almost like a religion! The fact of the matter is that Tablets similar to the Ipad have been around forever, but because now there is an apple logo slapped on it, people NEED to have one. So is a slow, unusable Ipad really worth? I don’t think so but feel free to try and prove me wrong.
Peep Show has to be one of the best sitcoms out there, however, it really isn’t known of here in Canada. Why? Because Canadians are generally naive!
Luckily for you I found all 6 seasons in a playlist on youtube so you can go and indulge all you like.
And just incase if you prefer sampling the product before biting here is a short 2min clip from one of the episodes – watch it till the END!: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gCL-qnBQzUo
Enjoy,
Now…not that any of you deserve this, what with how many of you are cretins, but I’ve devised a brilliant plan that you’re welcome to implement to save yourselves big bucks at the pumps:
STEP 1: Fill up your car.
STEP 2: Drive Away.
(Optional)STEP 3: Flip off Attendant
